{"id":102874,"date":"2019-09-12T12:30:09","date_gmt":"2019-09-12T10:30:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.erasmusmagazine.nl\/en\/?p=102874"},"modified":"2025-12-19T11:24:28","modified_gmt":"2025-12-19T10:24:28","slug":"rsms-employee-proposed-marriage-in-a-very-unusual-way","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.erasmusmagazine.nl\/en\/2019\/09\/12\/rsms-employee-proposed-marriage-in-a-very-unusual-way\/","title":{"rendered":"This RSM employee proposed marriage in a very romantic way"},"content":{"rendered":"

Derck Koolen and Stephanie Maas fell head over heels in love while doing their PhDs at Rotterdam School of Management (RSM). Derck took two years to propose, sending Stephanie postcards with a \u2018secret message\u2019 from all over the world.<\/p>\n

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Derck Koolen and Stephanie Maas <\/span><\/p>

\n\t\n\n<\/svg>\n<\/span>\n\tImage by:<\/span>\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAmber Leijen<\/a>\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>

Stephanie and Derck met during a night out with a group of PhD students from RSM. Stephanie was about to leave for Colombia to do a consultancy project and was keen to learn salsa dancing. \u201cI just thought it would be fun if you could do a bit of salsa dancing there,\u201d she says. Derck had done salsa classes at Erasmus Sport and offered to help Stephanie learn how to salsa. \u201cOn a salsa evening, the spark was ignited,\u201d he says. \u201cBut we never danced salsa again after that,\u201d Stephanie laughs.<\/p>\n

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They fell in love during their PhD at RSM.\n\n<\/span><\/p>

\n\t\n\n<\/svg>\n<\/span>\n\tImage by:<\/span>\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAmber Leijen<\/a>\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>

Unobtrusive<\/h2>

It didn\u2019t take long before the two knew that they were meant for each other. \u201cWe definitely had the feeling of \u2018this is it<\/em>\u2019 pretty quickly,\u201d says Stephanie. It was exactly around that time that Derck embarked on his plan to ask Stephanie to marry him.<\/p>\n

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On each card, there's one letter marked with hearts.<\/span><\/p><\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>

For their work, they often travel abroad separately for a conference, research project or to teach. Derck decided that every time he went away, he would send Stephanie a secret message on a postcard. \u201cI sent the first card from Berkeley,\u201d he says. On each subsequent card, there would be one or sometimes two letters marked with hearts. \u201cThe hearts were so unobtrusive,\u201d says Stephanie. \u201cIt\u2019s always nice to receive a lovely card, so you don\u2019t look for anything behind little things like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

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Derck\u2019s postcards.<\/span><\/p>

\n\t\n\n<\/svg>\n<\/span>\n\tImage by:<\/span>\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAmber Leijen<\/a>\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>

PostSecret<\/h2>

Derck came up with the idea because Stephanie is mad about PostSecret<\/a>, a website that publishes anonymous postcards with secrets. At the end of the series of postcards, Derck also sent a card \u2013 with his secret \u2013 to the PostSecret website.<\/p>\n

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The postcard that Derck sent to PostSecret.<\/span><\/p>

\n\t\n\n<\/svg>\n<\/span>\n\tImage by:<\/span>\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAmber Leijen<\/a>\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>

He sent the last card to Stephanie while they were on holiday together in South Africa. To be on the safe side, he also went down on his knee. Of course, Stephanie immediately said \u2018yes\u2019. \u201cIt was such a lovely proposal,\u201d says Stephanie. Derck had also done his best for the engagement ring. \u201cThe previous year, we were in London and we saw a really lovely ring,\u201d says Stephanie. Derck tracked down the shop and ordered the ring. \u201cIt\u2019s brilliant that he managed to find the ring a year later.\u201d<\/p>\n

After the proposal in South Africa, Stephanie found Derck\u2019s card in the mailbox, with a final instruction. \u201cIt said that I had to visit the PostSecret website.\u201d Over the course of two years, Derck had sent fourteen postcards. \u201cWhen you put the cards in sequence, the letters with the hearts spell out: \u201cwill you marry me?<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n

No arguments<\/h2>

The couple radiate romance. They only talk about each other in terms of praise. \u201cStephanie is sweet, smart and beautiful,\u201d says Derck. \u201cI\u2019ve never met anyone more wonderful than she is, so I quickly decided: I must have her.\u201d And Derck is a real man, Stephanie feels. \u201cBut at the same time, he\u2019s very caring, sweet and protective. He\u2019s also the sexiest man at RSM.\u201d<\/p>\n

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Love is in the air.<\/span><\/p>

\n\t\n\n<\/svg>\n<\/span>\n\tImage by:<\/span>\n\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAmber Leijen<\/a>\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>

They have more similarities than differences, say the couple. \u201cWe both love exploring the world, travelling, trying out things,\u201d says Stephanie. Do they argue? \u201cNever,\u201d she says. \u201cWe\u2019re not the most difficult people, so we never get upset about little things.\u201d Derck agrees. \u201cWe occasionally have a difference of opinion, but we both always think \u2018is this worth arguing about?\u2019 But perhaps it\u2019s because we\u2019ve only been together for three years? Things might change after thirty years,\u201d he laughs.<\/p>\n

The couple haven\u2019t got a wedding date yet, but it will probably be some time in October next year. That will give them the time and space to prepare. \u201cI\u2019ve just got my PhD. I\u2019m leaving the academic world and going to work in the energy industry,\u201d says Derck. \u201cEarly next year, Stephanie will finish her PhD, and then we\u2019ll have more time to plan the wedding.\u201d They don\u2019t have a particular idea of their dream wedding, but it will be green, because Stephanie loves plants. \u201cBefore I met Stephanie, I only had two plants,\u201d says Derck. \u201cNow we have around fifty at home.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\t

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De redactie<\/h2>\n\t\t\n\t\t
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